I was honored with being welcomed into a sweat lodge experience. For my readers who may not know, sweat lodges differ from a sauna. One allows the chance to focus on the physical; sweating out toxins, immunity building, weight loss, etc. The other, while still reaping these benefits, focuses on the spiritual aspects of the self.
I feel I need to preface my writing to state that this chronicle is no more than my own personal experience. Nothing I write is to offend, promote, or even dissuade my readers one way or the other.
To begin this chronicle, I state clearly and without shame that I was very apprehensive of the upcoming experience. The thought of being confined in a small space with other people, some I knew, most I didn't, while steam touched my skin coaxing out my emotions, was a little much for me to consider. I went so far as to discuss my feelings with my therapist whom promptly stated that because of the apprehension, it was best I give it shot. He helped me to take a different view point. The recommendation given was to go into this from an explorative mentality as a writer. Take the experience provided, submerse myself, then come out knowing more one way or the other.
This is what I discovered.
It's hot. It's dark. You sweat.
Ok, so those are the obvious, and affect the physical you. The impact to the psyche is much more.
Once I was flooded in darkness, my initial response was panic. Hot stones in front of me, no clear way to the one exit without stumbling and burning myself. Just the option to sit alone with myself, well, and the others bunched as sardines in there with me. It was quiet at first. I gripped tightly to the person next to me, a dear friend, and began to find ways to ground myself. Their head on my shoulder helping. Then, the drums began to reverberate off the blanketed walls accompanied by the resounding voices of group members singing. It was a concert of healing just for me it seemed.
Being one of music, this settled me more than I realized. It also broke the dam within me, letting loose the reservoir of hurt.
Throughout the journey within the lodge, the tears and sweat intermixed. Reminding me of the balance ever present between the physical and emotional self. I am not sure just yet what I released in there. This may come to me when I least expect, as most prominent moments do. What I do know, is the greater respect I gained for balance.
"Don't sweat the small stuff." This is a thought I hold onto passionately. Taking a look at it now, I wonder how often I allow this to be used as an excuse for removing myself from own emotions. Maybe I do need to sweat the small stuff, the big stuff, the immeasurable stuff. If for no other reason than to allow the scales to find equilibrium.
So, sweat it out when you have the chance. Through exercise, saunas, hot baths, steam filled showers, or give a sweat lodge a try. If nothing else, your glowing skin will thank you for it.
With hope,
Anndi
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